Anger is basically a way to push people’s limits and express to others that they are threatening them. It is a way to try to get control of the situation. If the opposite to be angry is to be sorry, then crying is a way to try to attract attention and anger is a way to call it out.
There are different forms of aggression and you can learn to tell the difference between them. They can be handled in different ways. There is for example a difference between someone who uses anger as a strategy to intimidate others, and someone who is genuinely angry to defend something within himself.
Angry people want to be understood, that someone will notice it and show that they care about their anger. It need not be that complicated. People are people wherever they are.
Two common difficulties are that you want to defend themselves and to take for himself. To deal with the desire of the defense, it is important to know that it is possible to listen and understand – to agree. The fact is that it is possible to listen and understand someone who’s angry at himself, even if it is unfair.
To deal with the anger, it is important that you understand that the person is angry, and why. You can, for example, explain that if that’s how they see the situation so you can understand their anger.
It is easier to discuss constructive if you care about their anger. I would also become angry if someone took my parking space, but I do not agree that I took it. How to determine who was there first, we can talk about when the anger is subsided.
To show that we are listening, care for and respect the feeling someone is to show respect for that person. It is often a powerful experience because we are not accustomed to someone who shows genuine concern toward our emotions, especially anger. In a relationship, it is a way to build trust in each other. Therefore, it is not unusual to strengthen a relationship by handling the other’s aggression constructively.